Validation through Rationalization

The one that got away....

We began the search for a house roughly four months ago, and early in the process we found the perfect house.  Where we wanted, what we wanted, great price, eager sellers... everything fell into place and we put in a bid.  The house had been on the market for months and wasn't even getting nibbles any more - yet it was that very same week in early December another family decided it too was what they were looking for - and voting with their dollars - showed they wanted it more.

Our realtor assured us, in all her years of sales (over 300 houses), everyone has always ended up with a better house than the one that got away.  If we didn't get the house we thought was perfect, it really wasn't, and a better perfect was waiting for us.  For our sanity we decided to go along with the premise - at least half heartedly.

We'll, we should close in less than a week (we've been thinking that for over 2 weeks, but that is another story), and we are really excited about the new house - but is it the better perfect?  Just to clarify, we don't really view any as perfect, it's just an hyperbolic expression.  We walk by the one that got away regularly.  It has attributes we still desire - but the one we are buying is probably better for us.   Is our realtor right that you always end up with the one you are supposed to have - the one down the road will be better than the one you got out bid on - or do we rationalize that the second is better than the first to cope with life?

Just like yesterday, do we validate the path we are on, because it is the one we are on?  Probably.
Can we take a step back and evaluate our path?  Better yet, are we open to listen to others, outside observers, to have help evaluating our path.  When house shopping we created our list of where we ultimately wanted to end up (to avoid the woo of pretty and shiny), we listened to our passion (or in my case whether Jen jumped up or down, or not), we valued the input of our realtor as someone who knew the housing market and got to know us, and we valued the input of friends and family who would speak the truth in love.

If we do this to buy a house - are we doing this to chart the course of our life, and the lives of our children?

• what values do we want?  what do we want at the end of life?
• do we listen to our heart?  pursuing our passions?
• do we seek out knowledgeable experts for their wisdom?
• do we allow those who care about us, but are not wrapped in our decisions, to speak? 

Is it true that the course I'm on is the best course for me? How about you?